The death of a family member or friend can be a devastating experience, and may bring about stronger emotions than you have ever felt before. Different people react in different ways and, even if there has been a long illness, there is still a sense of shock when a death occurs. You may experience anger, panic, and guilt in addition to sadness. These feelings may be accompanied by periods of restlessness, especially at night when it is difficult to sleep. You may lose your concentration and things may seem to go wrong or you lose confidence in yourself.
Be gentle with yourself. All these are natural reactions to bereavement and are not signs that you cannot cope any more. During this time you may need the support of others. Speaking to someone about how you feel may help you to feel less isolated in your sadness.
This can also be a difficult time for family and friends who, in addition to their own sadness, may be afraid to speak about your loved one in case they upset you. You may need to let others know that you want to talk about your loss in order to receive support.
Grief is a very individual process, so do not think that you should experience feelings exactly as described by anyone else. What is important is that you allow yourself time to grieve and deal come to terms with your loss in whatever way is right for you.
Some people may find it easier to talk about their feelings and worries to someone outside the family. There is help available and some of the resources are listed below. Asking for help can often be difficult but may be of great benefit to you.
Cruse Bereavement Care: www.cruse.org.uk (tel 0844 477 9400)
Wirral Cruse: www.cruse.org.uk/Wirral-area (tel 0151 645 6604)
Widowed and Young, for ages 50 years or younger: www.widowedandyoung.org.uk
These sites offer links to support and practical advice on issues you may have to deal with in bereavement:
Bereavement benefits: www.gov.uk/browse/benefits/bereavement
Bereavement Advice Centre: www.bereavementadvice.org/